Civil War Apocalypse: May 2016 Movie Preview

M: So, it’s rainy and cold (high 40’s, low 50’s), and promises to be about the same for the next five days. It snowed a couple weeks ago. This means, clearly, that it’s summer movie season! Well, at least, that’s what it means in New England, where spring generally fluctuates between “extended winter” and “hotter than hell”.

E: I’m pretty sure this is how we started the May preview last year, too. Doesn’t feel like spring here, let alone summer, but that’s what Hollywood considers it.

M: Well, that’s depressing. I’m sure I blamed Al Gore then, so I’ll lay off him this year.

E: Yes, I’m sure you did. I’m amazed at your forbearance.

M: Weather aside, with May come summer blockbusters, and this May is no exception. Now, we only have a couple, and there’s an overall lack of depth to the month’s offerings, but we’ve got at least the two comic-book tent poles to get us through.

E: And a couple of high profile adaptations which seem likely to generate big box office, as well as a low profile literary adaptation that I’m absolutely salivating over.

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The Year Really Starts Here: March 2016 Movie Preview

E: After the anemic leftovers of January and February, March brings a happy new dawn.  Actual movies to see!

M: And you’ve probably seen half of them already, since C and I have been overwhelmed with work and other life events, and have not been able to help E get this up in a timely manner. Also because of that, no trailers this month. Our sincerest apologies!

March 4thLondon Has Fallen, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, Zootopia, The Boy and the Beast, Knight of Cups

March 11th10 Cloverfield Lane, The Brothers Grimsby, Eye in the Sky, Hello My Name Is Doris, The Perfect Match, The Young Messiah

March 18thThe Divergent Series: Allegiant, Miracles From HeavenThe Little Prince

March 25thBatman Vs. Superman: The Dawn of Justice, My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2, The Disappointments Room, Born To Be Blue, Fastball, I Saw The Light
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Flops and Zombies: February Movie Preview 2016

M: If you’ve read our movie previews over the months/years, or if you’ve paid any attention to the box office, you know that February is usually a graveyard. It’s that wonderful combination of crap movies that studios are hoping will be a modest success because of the lack of competition, and bigger projects that have become albatrosses that the studios are trying to unload at a time that won’t be too painful, or mess up the rest of their carefully planned schedule. We’re hopeful that a few of these (Hail Caesar!, Race, Risen and Deadpool, for example) are the former rather than the latter, but, well, let’s just say we’re not holding our breathe.

E: Also, apologies, with a dissertation and wedding coming up fast, C will again not be joining us this month.

M: More so, E’s on her way to Mexico, so much of it will be left to me, which is significantly less fun for you, the readers, so we apologize. We are offering full refunds for anyone who is dissatisfied.

E: Maybe I’m dissatisfied with you hogging all the credit!

M: I’m trying to hog all the blame, and you’re welcome! Anyway, on to the movies!

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What’s Opening While You’re Repeat-Viewing Star Wars: Movie Preview January 2016

E: Oh, come on, let’s be honest about it. If I wasn’t hunting down Oscar flicks (many of which open in wide release in January, like Spotlight, Carol and The Danish Girl), I’d be at the theater watching The Force Awakens at least once a week. You know you all want to. And the January slate isn’t exactly tempting any of us to do otherwise.

M: While I don’t think I’d make it once a week (as much as I liked it, I still have four kids, including a one year old, and far too many responsibilities), before I start watching trailers the only thing I see that would even contend with another viewing of TFA is Kung Fu Panda 3, and that’s a very weak maybe.

E: Well, I haven’t made it once a week, but I did bring my four kids to see it twice already.  Who knows how many more viewings will be in their future?  Plus you and C and I wanted to go once just three of us to geek out together… if poor C ever can get time away from the job hunting and wedding planning that’s preventing her from joining in this month.

M: Not to mention dissertation writing and speaking at conferences. She’s a busy lass, that little sister of ours.

E: I think there’s one more movie on this list that might be theatrical-level watchable, but we’ll get to that. Kung Fu Panda‘s certainly the one I’m mostly likely to take my kids to. Otherwise, it’s all Star Wars and Oscar movies for me.  In fact, I’m literally headed to the theater to see pseudo-frontrunner Spotlight right after we finish this.

M: We’ll get into Oscar more in the months ahead, but I don’t know if “pseudo-frontrunner” is even appropriate, as every different precursor awards is picking different things, and leaving different things, including all the favorites, off. Anyway, back to January movies, which we’re a week late for, largely because nothing much opened on January 1st.

E: Exactly. Remember the abundance of December?  It hogged two months worth of movies and left January with tiny scraps. In other words, 2016 starts with a whimper.

Week 1 – Anomalisa, Yosemite

Week 2 – The Forest, Diablo

Week 3 – 13 Hours, Norm of the North, Ride Along 2

Week 4 – The 5th Wave, Dirty Grandpa, The Boy, Synchronicity, Terminus

Week 5 – Kung Fu Panda 3, Fifty Shades of Black, The Finest Hours, Jane Got a Gun Continue reading

December 2015 Movie Preview: Star Wars… Nothing but Star Wars

M: Okay, if you don’t understand the title, you need to do one of two things. First, if you don’t understand it because you don’t know that the first new Star Wars movie in the post-George Lucas era, directed by J.J. Abrams, is coming out this month, then you need to climb out from whatever rock you’ve been under for the last year or two. Second, if it’s because you don’t get the reference, you need to watch this old Bill Murry SNL sketch.

C: I actually did not get that reference, and now feel shame.

E: The key point is, it’s all about Star Wars. And Oscar movies. Star Wars and awards bait.  You know what?  It’s a lot of movies, period.

M: Well, not the SNL sketch, our December movie post. The sketch is only about Star Wars. However, since as E said, we won’t actually be talking “nothing but Star Wars,” a quick note. There are about a billion movies of note being released the first weekend this month.

C: Actually, it’s 10.

M: …fine, 10. There are 10 movies of note being released the first weekend this month. Most of them, really all but the Christmas comedy-horror flick Krampus, are limited, small releases, but still, that’s a lot even for the small releases. The month evens out a bit after that, but ramps up again in time for the Christmas school break.

E: Well, those Oscar movies have to play somewhere in December or they don’t qualify!  Not that all of these are exactly Oscar-bait.

C: That is a crazy lot, anyway. So brace yourselves!

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Fall 2015 Television Preview: Sunday

C: Late, bruised, and crawling toward the finishing line after a full week of previews, we reveal the ace up our sleeves, the man behind the curtain, the best wine saved for the drunkest wedding guests… I may be floundering for a metaphor here. The point is, we’re ending instead of starting with Sunday, and Sunday night TV is actually good.

E: Sunday night TV is sooo good; it’s definitely top shelf.  This is the night that the heavens are bright with small screens and television stars.  The night when every channel has its A game on.  This is the most ridiculously overstuffed night of awesome TV we got.

C: Even I — yes, I! — will reveal that there’s a show on TV that I’m still watching from last year, and it’s on Sundays.

M: As always, if you need to catch up, here are the previews for Monday, TuesdayWednesday, Thursday and Friday/Saturday. Continue reading

Batkid Rules: June 2015 Movie Preview

M: There are only a handful of wide releases coming to theaters in June, some of them of the variety that busts the block. We expect Jurassic World will bring in some serious coin, as should Inside Out. The latter might even be a good movie.

C: The premise is pretty weird, but Pixar’s hit rate is unquestionable.

M: That it is, as we’ll discuss. However, while some of the big offerings this month do look promising, we’re much more excited for a small documentary about a boy with leukemia.

E: I agree — this month’s slate of prospective tentpoles doesn’t thrill me nearly so much as that intensely moving and celebratory documentary.

C: And here I assumed you’d be more excited for A Pigeon Sat on a Branch Reflecting on Existence, E!

M: You and me both, sis!

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