E: I’m not saying all, or even any of this is going to happen, but this is what I want out of this year’s Emmy telecast, taking place tonight.
First off, some real comedy gold from host Jane Lynch. The Emmy’s have been tremendously lucky in their recent choice of hosts – Jimmy Fallon killed last year, and Neil Patrick Harris is a reliably dapper and amusing host. Jane Lynch might be best known now as Coach Sue Sylvester on Glee, but her roots go deep into improv comedy, from Chicago’s peerless Second City troupe to the Christopher Guest films. She shone in the brilliant family favorite Best in Show. Heck, I cried laughing when she and Bill Maher did that dramatic reading of Anthony Weiner’s text messages. So Jane, I have expectations! A great opening number. Witty repartee during the show. I am counting on you – especially when looking forward (gulp) to Eddie Murphy hosting the Oscars. Emmy’s done well with blond lesbians before. You better bring it, sister!
And as always, I love the dresses. I’m no fashionista, but what girl doesn’t like seeing a raft of pretty frocks? This is good stuff, and I love it. So bring on the glam, girls! And guys, no heinous beards or doofy hats, okay?
I have far fewer expectations when it comes winners. Modern Family and Mad Men are likely to clean up, and I don’t watch either of those shows, so I’m not emotionally invested in that. I was emotionally invested in some of the so called “creative” awards which were already announced – my heart was crushed to find that Cat Deeley lost to Jeff Probst in the Best Reality Show Host. Voters, you need to stop acting like sheep and actually watch this woman weave her magic. I suppose, however, that as long as Cat comes to the show in one of her fascinating gowns, I’m glad to know in advance and not get my heart broken on Emmy night.
Obviously I’m rooting for The Good Wife cast to take home some of their acting nods. I don’t have any illusions about the show winning for itself, but Archie Panjabi might possibly repeat (though I hear Margo Martindale of Justified has supporting actress locked up, and perhaps Panjabi’s win was too based on buzz and shock). The best chance, as I see it, is that Julianna Margulies might capture the lead actress award which she was robbed of last year. Here’s hoping! I would be shocked – though happily – to see Josh Charles or Alan Cumming or Christine Baranski take home a prize, though of course I’d love that too.
Will there be sentimental wins for Steve Carrell, Connie Britton and Kyle Chandler for their final seasons in lauded roles? Maybe Carrell will top the comedy leader board, but it seems more likely that Britton and Chandler’s reward was their nominations. Jon Hamm and (hurrah!) Julianna Margulies are the ones the pundits are predicting. I don’t want to get too sanguine about Julianna, though, because I was pretty sure she had a good shot at the trophy last year, too. Will host Jane Lynch win her comedy supporting category, even after the dreck she was given to work with this season? I don’t know, but I’d love to see Betty White give an acceptance speech.
Which brings me to my last Emmy wish. I wish for the acceptance speeches to be more than just thank you lists! I realize this is your big moment, people, but you’re entertainers in front of a live audience! Use your platform! Entertain us! Be funny! Cry! I don’t care what. Surprise me. That’s always the best.